Part One: Breakfast & One Flaw

“What am I supposed to do about Sean? His only flaw is being married.”

“Bitch, what?”

It’s only 9 a.m.…Scratch that. It’s almost noon and we had some strong shots last night. What Nadia just said is already too much for this Thursday morning. Shit, I mean day. Where did time go?

Court’Ne is over Nadia’s statement, shaking her own head as she scraps her fresh, hot eggs onto her plate from her favorite skillet. Standing near the oven, she accompanied her meal with mixed berries and sliced avocado, no other protein. She didn’t play about her food, always colorful and tasty. She never fails to make a meal nutritionally, but she sneaks pork in every now and then. Court’Ne loves bacon. One thing for certain you can count on with this woman is everything she touches is graced by benevolence. Court'Ne takes pride in being authentically raw, even if she's being judged by a Christian person. She happened to make a duplicate plate, bringing it straight to me. Nadia would get a plate too…if this was her last immoral straw with Court’Ne.

Nadia flipped her hair, long knotless plaits that hung right above her perky butt. She was standing against the counter near the kitchen sink. She decided to sit at the dining table with us, on other side, ignoring the hardening glares from my best friend of 15 years. “Nee

Nee, you can judge me all you want but I’m just being honest.”

“I don’t give a shit about honesty.” Court’Ne took a forkful of her food, her utensil layered in colors and a little steam. She then took a sip of her hot hibiscus tea. I was okay with orange juice. Between Court’Ne and me, she knows I’m still warming up to tea. “You need to leave him alone.”

“She—” Nadia pointed at me, leaning in against the table, “may take all your advice but I am my own woman. My life, my choice. If I still wanna see Sean, that is my business.”

Court’Ne smirked and shrugged her shoulders, softly smacking on her food. After a few more bites and sips of her meal and drink, she let her eyes fall on her cell phone screen. I could see that she had her daily horoscope up. Nadia had started sipping coffee and writing in a planner. I just ate my food. I mean, I don’t agree with all of what Court’Ne warns against…

If only Court’Ne and Nadia knew about him.

If only they knew how much my soul still yearns for him.

I mean, Nadia has been our roommate for about a year now and she just started opening up to us several months ago. She’d talk about her parents or family reunions, but not much about her love life. Maybe a mention of a date here and there? I get it…You don’t know if you can trust everyone. Especially strangers you must agree to live with to keep a roof over your head. Court’Ne was against having a roommate after a few nightmares in her past. However, Nadia answered our online ad with her share of rent for the next 3 months and a clean background with no prior arrests. It’s hard to find that in Daisy County.

I miss him but he was—I mean is married too. He claimed separation when I confronted him with “through the grapevine” news. Court’Ne found his wife and her Instagram full of happily-married-photos, after having a hunch. He seemed to be proud to be a part of these pictures that depicted a tightknit family. How could I believe he was truly separated when he had spent all New Year’s weekend with me—after spending the same time with his wife and kids the previous week? We were together for almost a year as well…How did I miss the signs?